Some days I get sad when I see other babies living the life I thought Mia would be living. I get sad that she's been here in the hospital for months. I see my little nephew growing and thriving. My parents adore him. He gets to be surrounded by family every day, while Mia feels their love from afar. Our life consists of tubes, monitors, charting, assessments, nurses, doctors, medicine...
There are so many things other parents take for granted. When Mia cries on the vent, it's a silent cry. Her little face shows her cries, but no sound is heard. I want to pick her up and comfort her, but she has so many things attached to her, so picking her up isn't the easiest thing. My only option is to pat her and try to soothe her, hoping that my nearness is enough. Dressing her in clothes is also not an easy task, so whenever we get the chance to dress her up, we are excited. Seems
like such a little thing to get excited about, but in this life, you learn that the simple things can bring such joy.
When I was pregnant with Mia, I fantasized about the person she would be. I pictured a little baby crawling around the house. I imagined her growing up into a happy little girl. It's easy to let these feelings overwhelm me at times. When I login to Facebook, I see so many friends with healthy babies doing the things I wish Mia could be doing. Jealousy and sadness come over me for a second, but then I am filled with peace. I'm extremely blessed by God. Mia is angel sent by Him. She is here to teach and inspire the world. He has performed many miracles through her, and I've been lucky enough to witness them firsthand. I am truly honored God picked me to be on this journey with Mia. Because of her, I've been able to meet so many other people I might not have ever come in touch with. She has touched the hearts of so many nurses, respiratory therapists, and doctors. She is teaching them about life.
Mia has enriched our lives in so many ways. She is an amazing picture of God's miracles. God has entrusted her with a big job here on earth, and I'm incredibly lucky to be apart of it.